The Most Powerful Insight I Can Offer

Ever feel frustrated, stressed, or overwhelmed? 

Maybe you’ve thought:

“My boss changed the scope of my project yet again, making the work I did last week irrelevant.”

Or

“My partner forgot to pick up juice boxes for the school donation, and now it’s on me to swing by the grocery store in addition to getting the kids ready and dropping them off.”

Or

“I’m getting emails all day long from multiple clients who need something from me right away.”

It’s easy to believe that other people or the situation are causing your feelings, right?

Well, here’s a surprise: it’s not them. (Sorry!)

What’s actually causing you to feel annoyed, frustrated, and stressed are your THOUGHTS about the circumstances.

Thoughts like…

“My boss is incompetent”

“My partner can’t be counted on”

“I have too much to do in too little time”

It’s your interpretations of the situation or the person’s actions that are causing you to feel a certain way. 

But here’s the good news: knowing this gives you much more control over how you feel. You can choose how you want to feel. 

Sometimes, it’s right to feel angry or disappointed. 

If you just got a bad performance review, it’s normal to feel worried, angry, and defiant. Allow those feelings and process them. 

But if you don’t want to feel frustrated with your spouse, or bitter at your boss, you can start to actively find more neutral or positive thoughts that trigger better-quality feelings for you.

Like:

“My partner is juggling a lot, and I know he had every intention to help me out.”  

Or

“I wonder if my boss is getting as much context as she needs from our leadership about our priorities?”

Thoughts like these likely trigger compassion or curiosity. 

Now, I’m not saying this is easy. It’s far easier to blame someone or a situation than it is to take ownership of our emotions. 

Trust me. I do this thought work all the time, and I still wrestle with it! 

But when you don’t take ownership over how you feel, you’re giving your power away. 

No one else can make you feel a certain way. Only you can. 

Here’s to you taking back your power and choosing how you want to feel.